Overdosing on Benedryl and Forgetting How to Dream

     I'd like to think I can sleep whenever I want. It's such a waste of time, isn't it? Sleeping. That's 10 hours of my life per day that could go toward something else. Eating seems like a waste of time, too. I could be blogging. I could be reading. I could be listening to music. I could be going places. But, no...instead I have to sleep.
     I'd also like to think I'm not bitter. Ha! Mmm...no.
     The t.v. that sits on the carpet of my room can only do one thing: allow me to plug in an annoying looking, portable Pac-Man/Galaga/Pole Position/Xevious/Mappy joystick controller. The buttons don't always work and the joystick frequently jams up, but when you can't fall asleep, it'll do.

One word: GHETTO.

Ignore the blank screen. I forgot to turn off the joystick so the batteries ran out.

Of course, I'm in the dark, so it looks more like this.

   
     The dark is a wonderful place. But, it's also the reason I need glasses with a prescription of triple digits. Even in a photo, that one in the dark kind of hurts my eyes. I'm a horrendous Pac-man player too. I can't blame the controller for everything, unfortunately. However, Galaga? I'm a reigning champion. Not even joking, I've been playing that game since I got the first Gameboy Advance. I've sort of been working on my high score since I came out of the womb. 

     Besides my adventures with spaceships, aliens, and trophies that don't exist, I've been having difficulty dreaming. I know that someone with a degree says that we all dream at least five times a night or whatever, but that's really hard to believe right now. When I eventually fall asleep, I don't remember anything. Have I forgotten how to dream? The last dream I remember was a nightmare. I hope I haven't forgotten how to dream, a nightmare would be a horrible way to end it, don't you think? 

     I've been forcing myself to write also. Hence; poor word choice, sloppy sentence structures, and NO MORALS TO MY INCESSANT COMPLAINING. 

     They say that to be a good writer, you have to write everyday; even if it's poor writing. So, here is me sucking it up, vomiting thoughts onto a keyboard, and hoping my writer's block will go away. 

Whit Happens

P.S. If you don't know any of those games on the controller, Google them. They're fun. Well...I think they are, but what do I know? Find out for yourself.
P.P.S. In case you're having a not-so-grand day, here's a photo (compliments of Cassy) that I bet will make you smile. Or not. 

Well, you can't just set it down!

     

Of Late, I...

1. have been paying attention.
2. depend on my fingers.
3. love notebooks
4. hate computers
5. purchased an instant camera
6. kicked a chair when I discovered the camera's battery is dead.
7. cried a little, over nothing in particular.
8. laughed a bit, over everything that doesn't work.
9. turned left at a sign that read, "Right Turn Only".
10. flew an imaginary plane 'cross a library hall.
11. pretended not to care about things that really made me want to fold up like a clam.
12. shushed my dog when he barked.
13. bruised my hip on a doorknob that wasn't there two seconds prior.
14. made a decision.
15. had a horrible nightmare.
16. wrote a poem.
17. played at Velour.
18. have been oddly generous.
19. talked to myself.
20. wished I wasn't so quiet sometimes.
21. held my breath.
22. listened a little better.
23. want an accordian.
24. needed more silence than usual.
25. made excuses.
26. wrapped my pinky in scotch tape.
27. purposely poured water on the floor.
28. spent money I don't have.
29. forgave the undeserving.
30. regret saying that.

Reoccuring Nightmares

On rare occasions, I realize that I’m not perfect.

On rarer occasions, I notice that there are other people around me.

On even rarer occasions, I see that these sociopaths whom I call “peers” are not perfect either, but try to give off that illusion and I am no different from them.

Then I roll over and go back to sleep and my obtuse mind continues to tune out the journey through high school/dystopia/Dante’s Inferno.